Learning how to co-parent with your ex can be a difficult transition period. How amicable your relationship is post-divorce can affect how you manage transfers with your kids. While some parents choose to have the pick-ups and drop-offs outlined within the parenting plan, others are more flexible.
Shortly following a divorce, having a strict plan may benefit you and your children.
Prepare your kids for drop-off or pick-up
First, prepare your kids for every pick-up and drop-off. The kids should know the schedule and understand how long they will stay with each parent. When kids have time to prepare, they tend to be less anxious. Likewise, you can stress less by knowing they have everything they need.
To alleviate the stress of the first few transfers, reassure your kids that spending time with you and their other parent is good for them. They need to understand that it is okay to want to spend time with both of you.
Stay consistent with the schedule
Do not deviate from the routine. Choose where you want to transfer your kids. If you and your former spouse have an amicable relationship, you may choose to pick your kids up at your ex’s home or vice versa. However, if you do not have a friendly relationship, choose a neutral place to meet for the transfer.
Children need to have routine and structure. Most have an easier time adapting to the new schedule when they can rely on it remaining consistent.
Sometimes unexpected events happen, so you should have an agreed-upon plan for dealing with schedule changes.